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Oct 22, 2004 20:12:03 GMT
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Rant 1: traveller looking bloke: Just coz you've got an e30 too, it doesn't mean that I want you too carve me up showing off. I realise you were in a hurry to get to the bookies, but that's no excuse really. Also take that 318iS badge off the back. Face facts. Your car is a B-reg rusty pile of cack sitting on tall springs and steel wheels. It's probably a 316 too. Wake up, you're not fooling anyone. Rant 2: Corsa driving Muppet. Yes you, driving your 1.2 nobba-mobile driving up the A1 this afternoon. Handy hint: If you see a red e30 approaching behind you at high velocity, the best advice is to MOVE THE curse word OVER. Do not spend the next 4 miles sitting in the right hand lane with your foot in the carpet, when the left hand lane is free. Face it. Your not gonna outrun me. EVER. Oh and those "Lexus" lights, baked bean can exhaust and limo tints just make you look like a PRICK. Rant 3: New mini drivers: See above as for Corsa driver, but add the following: You are a sad and pathetic little muppet in a cheap suit. Face it, no one likes estate agents. DO NOT PULL OUT IN FRONT OF ME WHEN I'M DOING A TON. It's not like you couldn't have seen me. Bright red car with the headlights on? It's kinda conspicuous. Rant over. Sorry. I'm having a bad day. Normal service has now resumed. Thankyou. PS top marks to the escort driver who thought he could take roundabouts at the same speed as me: It was great fun watching you understeer into the dusty/grassy bit at the side of the slip road in my mirrors. Top comedy. ;D ;D ;D
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Oct 22, 2004 20:25:49 GMT
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"He's not the messiah, he's a very naughty boy!"
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Oct 22, 2004 20:32:56 GMT
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Well, if you want me to start on Tony B Liar and his bunch of yes men, then be prepared for a long read as there is an obscene amount of thinly disguised vitriol bubbling beneath this usually placid surface for the current "labour" government..... ;D
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Oct 22, 2004 20:36:53 GMT
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Yeah, well my satirical rage is bigger than your satirical rage! ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
I don't think there's a right minded person in the UK that isn't at least a wee bit fed up with Blair and his bloody capitalist cronies!
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"He's not the messiah, he's a very naughty boy!"
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Daily Rant.....BenzBoy
@benzboy
Club Retro Rides Member 7
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Oct 22, 2004 21:04:32 GMT
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Top ranting! Superb! I have a good way of getting rid of Corsas ;D
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Oct 22, 2004 21:18:26 GMT
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His method is quite good. A Merc, a numptie driving the Corsa, and a big crunch!
I have another, it involves a jerry can full of petrol and some matches! ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
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"He's not the messiah, he's a very naughty boy!"
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Oct 22, 2004 21:34:55 GMT
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His method is quite good. A Merc, a numptie driving the Corsa, and a big crunch! I have another, it involves a jerry can full of petrol and some matches! ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D But also a five-year stretch for arson if you're not careful!!! (Oh and also the very real possibility of ending up with stumps for arms and no eyebrows....)
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Last Edit: Oct 22, 2004 21:35:44 GMT by nickb
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Oct 22, 2004 21:36:11 GMT
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That's why it also involves me sending a mate of mine to do it instead! ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
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"He's not the messiah, he's a very naughty boy!"
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Oct 22, 2004 21:40:06 GMT
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With friend like those, who needs enemies.....Scorchio!
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Oct 22, 2004 21:41:08 GMT
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;D ;D ;D ;D
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"He's not the messiah, he's a very naughty boy!"
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Oct 22, 2004 21:44:00 GMT
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TBH, governmental agencies have come in for alot of slagging round here of late, but someone on high is obviously listening: There are major plans afoot to prosecute those who sit in the right hand lane when two others are free and the traffic is building up behind them....hooray!
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Oct 22, 2004 21:45:24 GMT
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Maybe Tony has realised that he needs our votes at the next election? Well I don't think he's getting it! ;D ;D
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"He's not the messiah, he's a very naughty boy!"
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Daily Rant.....BenzBoy
@benzboy
Club Retro Rides Member 7
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Oct 22, 2004 22:41:46 GMT
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They're doing a similar thing on the M1 - trying to get people not to sit in the middle lane doing 65mph At present it's only signs up saying get out of the middle lane after overtaking. I would recommend surface-to-surface missile batteries sited at the roadside to launch at the offenders! ;D
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SkoCan
Posted a lot
Quando omni flunkus, mortati
Posts: 1,916
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How to start a Rant 101
Step 1 Find a nerve
Step 2 Test for Rawness
Step 3 Touch
;D
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consider yourself lucky, over here 95% of our main roads are only one lane in each direction its like someone staying in the fast lane permanently
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Daily Rant.....Deleted
@Deleted
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i have a good way of getting rid of corsa's and the like that think they can drive about 3" off my rear end in my daily hack ;D i admit my car may not pull away very well but it a mk2 granny estate it's about 2 ton ;D however it has very good brakes and a substantial tow bar and drivers of these sad little crumple zone clad cars just don't get it that if i stamp on my brakes a:they will have to hit there brakes and at that distance they can't steer round me ;D b:their abs system will make their braking distance longer than mine and c: their car will hit the back of what is a very solid rear end of a car that didn't have much in the way of crumple zones made even worse by the rather large tow bar wich on say a peugot 106 is about where the middle of the crank is once its stopped using its crumple zone ;D ;D ;D then they have to put up with me saying oh dear looks like you may have cracked my tail light i'll take you insurace details ;)and while i'm at it i think i'll call the old bill cause i think that could have been a bit to close that you were driving and that would be dangerous driving. 8-)one more chav off the road
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Oct 25, 2004 12:09:34 GMT
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Superb! My Amazon is quite similar in that respect - it has numerous battle-scars, one of which was when a modern car (IIRC it was a Peugeot?) tried to drive through it. Only a small dent / crease on the front door and (exposed) centre pillar of the Amazon, but no broken paint. The other car had to be towed away...... ;D
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Oct 25, 2004 12:46:13 GMT
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consider yourself lucky, over here 95% of our main roads are only one lane in each direction its like someone staying in the fast lane permanently Sounds like the barely metalled roads in the far North of Scotland (besides the A9, and the odd major road they're more often than not narrow, single track and up a freezing cold bloody mountain with a steep drop at one side of you and a forest at the other) which are no fun at all when lost tourists with caravans clog up the road and go at 15-20mph all the time. Makes the M8 going into Glasgow from Edinburgh at rush hour seem almost tolerable. Almost.
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"He's not the messiah, he's a very naughty boy!"
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