Oh man. Man oh Man. and other such slightly camply cliched phrases.
www.scumball500.com
If you want the BEST laugh while raising money for Cancer Research you MUST do this. Out of 10 it gets 15.
Right, the slightly hysterical bit over with, I can tell you lot all about it.
TBH I'm not sure where to start, so I think the beginning is the best place. This account may be embellished later as more details come back to me - I'm exhausted for reasons that will become apparent later on.
The event started in Calais at the Eastenders Beer and Wine Warehouse at 10am. We just made it - the ferry was delayed, but, as it turns out, it wasn't a rigid rigid start anyway.
The motley crew consisted of - Daimler, Grosvenor VI limo, BMW 635, BMW 325 (I think), Austin Montego, Fiesta, Transit van, Saab 990 (1978 and driven by a Flemish team), Proton 1.5 and us in the Colt Sapporo.
The limo team had world leader masks, the transits were the Wedding Van, with one bloke in a dress, another in a wedding dress, 2 in tux's and one dressed as a vicar. Those were the best costumes.
So, we start off from calais, my mate David driving so that Ican get a feel for the way of doing things. Bombing down the N roads was great, then we started on the tolls. What brillaint roads - completely puts the UK to shame in every respect.
The Sapporo was quite happy at 80 - or so it seemed until the oil pressure bottomed. So we stopped, filled up the fuel and the oil. To give you an idea, we put 6 litres of oil in over the weekend and probably averaged 28-31 mpg(ish).
Anyway, the general idea at the end of stages 1 and 2 was to get to a supermarket, buy a receipt to prove the time that you arrived then gently head over to the campste.
We had a mare of a time finding both supermarkets but did get there in the end. On day one, we didn't think and lost time workingout the route to the campsite with the Tranny team - we should have split up and one of us go in to get a choccy bar or something. Still, nevermind (had we thought tacticaly like this and not got lost on stages 1 + 2, we probably would have madeup something like 2.5hours. Nevermind).
The campsite on night one was really nice, tho the toilets were typical French hole inthe ground. One was not amused and resisted the urge with a sphincter of steel.
This was just south of Le Mans and a curse word to find.
Day two was heading down past Bordeaux and we stuck to the Autoroute, getting there as fast as we could. Didn't see so much nice scenery to be honest, but the driving was pretty good. Few tolls here and there, but we made good time.
The place we were staying was a little town called Arcachon, and the campsite was near Les Dunes de Pyat - world famous apparently. There's one massive dune that you can clamber up (using steel ladders) and the view from the top is amazing. I got up there the first time at about sunsest - but didn't take the camera as I planned to get sunrise the next morning. That didn't happen.... Doh
So, next day is Orleans, well Olivet. back up the way we've come, more fuel, more oil - all the usual.
We're getting steadily quicker over the stages, making good time. The car is being really good, although the prop bounces in a buggered bush and the suspension (or maybe its teh prop again) clatters over cobbles.
Not really much to report on this stage - all autoroute at 85mph.
The final night was brilliant - a really good party, lots of drinking, lots of excitement.
Got up yesterday morning and planned a trip straight to Calais via La periferique in Paris. one of the cameramen decided to come along with us to film the event (by the way, everyone decided that our car was easily the coolest one there).
So, we're bombing along making fantastic time.
At this stage, we're 4 mins ahead of the Vikings (Saab 900), and 45 mins behind the tranny van - but they were doing driver changes on the move - literally!
I'm pushing by this point, cruising at 90, hitting 110 for a few moments. We needed to be ahead of the Vikings still. The car was running beautifully and I was delighted.
La Periferique was lovely, bit busy, totally mad but great fun. So we're the other side of Paris, less than 200km from Calais and it's time for a fuel stop.
www.scumball500.com
If you want the BEST laugh while raising money for Cancer Research you MUST do this. Out of 10 it gets 15.
Right, the slightly hysterical bit over with, I can tell you lot all about it.
TBH I'm not sure where to start, so I think the beginning is the best place. This account may be embellished later as more details come back to me - I'm exhausted for reasons that will become apparent later on.
The event started in Calais at the Eastenders Beer and Wine Warehouse at 10am. We just made it - the ferry was delayed, but, as it turns out, it wasn't a rigid rigid start anyway.
The motley crew consisted of - Daimler, Grosvenor VI limo, BMW 635, BMW 325 (I think), Austin Montego, Fiesta, Transit van, Saab 990 (1978 and driven by a Flemish team), Proton 1.5 and us in the Colt Sapporo.
The limo team had world leader masks, the transits were the Wedding Van, with one bloke in a dress, another in a wedding dress, 2 in tux's and one dressed as a vicar. Those were the best costumes.
So, we start off from calais, my mate David driving so that Ican get a feel for the way of doing things. Bombing down the N roads was great, then we started on the tolls. What brillaint roads - completely puts the UK to shame in every respect.
The Sapporo was quite happy at 80 - or so it seemed until the oil pressure bottomed. So we stopped, filled up the fuel and the oil. To give you an idea, we put 6 litres of oil in over the weekend and probably averaged 28-31 mpg(ish).
Anyway, the general idea at the end of stages 1 and 2 was to get to a supermarket, buy a receipt to prove the time that you arrived then gently head over to the campste.
We had a mare of a time finding both supermarkets but did get there in the end. On day one, we didn't think and lost time workingout the route to the campsite with the Tranny team - we should have split up and one of us go in to get a choccy bar or something. Still, nevermind (had we thought tacticaly like this and not got lost on stages 1 + 2, we probably would have madeup something like 2.5hours. Nevermind).
The campsite on night one was really nice, tho the toilets were typical French hole inthe ground. One was not amused and resisted the urge with a sphincter of steel.
This was just south of Le Mans and a curse word to find.
Day two was heading down past Bordeaux and we stuck to the Autoroute, getting there as fast as we could. Didn't see so much nice scenery to be honest, but the driving was pretty good. Few tolls here and there, but we made good time.
The place we were staying was a little town called Arcachon, and the campsite was near Les Dunes de Pyat - world famous apparently. There's one massive dune that you can clamber up (using steel ladders) and the view from the top is amazing. I got up there the first time at about sunsest - but didn't take the camera as I planned to get sunrise the next morning. That didn't happen.... Doh
So, next day is Orleans, well Olivet. back up the way we've come, more fuel, more oil - all the usual.
We're getting steadily quicker over the stages, making good time. The car is being really good, although the prop bounces in a buggered bush and the suspension (or maybe its teh prop again) clatters over cobbles.
Not really much to report on this stage - all autoroute at 85mph.
The final night was brilliant - a really good party, lots of drinking, lots of excitement.
Got up yesterday morning and planned a trip straight to Calais via La periferique in Paris. one of the cameramen decided to come along with us to film the event (by the way, everyone decided that our car was easily the coolest one there).
So, we're bombing along making fantastic time.
At this stage, we're 4 mins ahead of the Vikings (Saab 900), and 45 mins behind the tranny van - but they were doing driver changes on the move - literally!
I'm pushing by this point, cruising at 90, hitting 110 for a few moments. We needed to be ahead of the Vikings still. The car was running beautifully and I was delighted.
La Periferique was lovely, bit busy, totally mad but great fun. So we're the other side of Paris, less than 200km from Calais and it's time for a fuel stop.
), how much did it all set you back (if you don't mind me asking?). Certainly sounds like a good way to kill a few days next May!
[*]
