Letter from Manila - Santol - of course!

It would seem that most of the ones the police have had dealings with appear to be pretty quiet now.

Well, the things you find out.

In an attempt to deliver on your request and knowing it'll be a day or two before I'd be there again, I put 'Ace Hardware, Mall of Asia' into Google Images. Strange, but every picture shows male sales staff, despite them being in a considerable minority and usually only there to pack your bag for you.

I wonder if that's to make punters, when they peruse the pictures before first visiting, feel that the place is full of clever young men all knowledgeable about plumbing and other vital DIY skills? If so, they are destined to be severely disappointed.

Me, knowing beforehand I'm going to get a blank look to any query, would far rather it came from a pretty Filipina in tight black trousers than some spotty youth straight out of "The Mrs Sanchez Akadamy for Young Men - Ingrish Langwage hour Specialliti", thank you!

Maybe I will take a trip this weekend!

To be confirmed, looks like I might be able to get a later flight with less time in transit...

Bingo! They are quite snug

Maligayang Araw ng Maynila!

Or, as we would say, Merry Manila Day!



Yep, it’s another holiday. Well, it has been 12 days since the last one. And this is not without a certain irony. The previous holiday on the 12 June you will remember, was for Independence Day, marking the anniversary of the end of the hated Spanish occupation, whereas today celebrates the self-same despised Spanish declaring Manila a city!

It would seem that on this day in 1571, the then gaffer, Miguel Lopez de Legaspi, known as Mike the Smoke to his mates, decided that the traffic was now bad enough for Manila to elevate it’s status from a lowly town to a full blown city, whilst declaring it the Capital at the same time. Thus laying the foundations for the mega-shambles we see today. Thanks Mikey, and don’t let the door hit your ass on the way out.

This is quite a private little holiday, only observed by Manila City, but not in the other 16 that make up Metro Manila. Unsurprisingly, festivities started a couple of days before the actual holiday, after all, why have only one day off when you can have two or three? And as only Manileños get the day off, they can look down on the peasants from everywhere else (which they do anyway) who have to work. Quite right too, someone has to open the malls. This “Pearl of the Orient” is, after all, the centre of the known universe.



The day will be celebrated by the wealthy locals in the traditional manner, that of wandering vacantly around the many shopping malls, getting in other folk’s way. The poor ones, for whom every day is a holiday, will sit, sleep, eat, steal, rummage through one another’s hair for nits, sort some rubbish and maybe beg a little. Same as usual.


                       Just another day for the Sanchez family

As my little tribe are spending the weekend at our picturesque and rose bedecked cottage in Tondo, mine shall be spent in a more British Bank Holiday manner, albeit without the drizzle. I shall wash the lawn and mow the car, followed by a brisk walk with the dog down to the local for a few beers and ending with a kip on the couch in the afternoon. Each to his own.

And it’s 14 days to the next one, how will we manage?

Heaven forbid!

Yeah, can you do that please?

I can only get snippets here and I've never worked this torrent malarkey out properly.

Thanks.

Glad you enjoyed it. I enjoy following Bourdain around the world via my couch. It highlights places I want to go as I go on my own food based adventures.
The sole reason we even considered, looked at how cheap flights were, and ended up in Penang was because of an episode of his earlier show, No Reservations.

After seeing the Manila episode, I'm a fair bit more interested in checking it out, now.
Although, I'd have to ensure I avoid the Christmas 'half' of the year, for my own sanity.

Well today’s the day. Today we have an event that will put the recent Brexit palaver to shame in its potential ramifications. Today we face a change like never before. Well, not quite never before, but close enough.

VIVA President Duterte!

Yes, as of 11:45 this morning we shall have a new president and the fish in Manila Bay are already licking their lips in anticipation.

Duterte flew in from Davao last night and before his departure stated his avowed intention upon arrival in Manila. Was it to click the safety off the trusty Presidential Webley .45 and head off into the drug addled areas of the city? Was it to tackle head-on the threat of the popular ISIS franchise opening a new branch in Mindanao? Fire off the opening broadside against China over the Spratly Islands perhaps? No, he publicly declared that his first action on arriving in the nation’s capital will be, in true Philippine style, to have a little lie down. A man at peace with himself, as one with the people and no mistake.

Not quite what we were expecting. It’s a bit like bracing yourself for the onslaught of a Category 5 Typhoon, only for it to drizzle a bit. But hey, the flight is nearly two hours, so there’s all that jet-lag to overcome, I suppose.

In the meantime, GMA News (The to-go-to site for Filipinos everywhere) had a touching little piece on P-noy’s last day as President, Apparently he split his time between Facebook and gazing out of his office window at the mighty Pasig River slipping glutinously by. So no real change there then and explains how he’s managed six years without getting his ass kicked out by some dissatisfied generals.



The moody photograph (above) published on his Facebook page depicts him gazing wistfully out of his office window for the last time and is captioned, "The President enjoys viewing the river full of migratory birds as he takes a break from everyday task as President," and here we must take exception.

Although I know it’s traditional to look back over any previous leader’s period of power with rose tinted specs but “… river full of migratory birds”? Come off it! The only way the Pasig would be full of migratory birds is if they were in the same condition as those about to wind up in Manila Bay, i.e., dead. I reckon any bird landing on the Pasig has a life expectancy of around 30 seconds as the toxic soup strips the very flesh from the bones, so don’t give us that migratory birds stuff, they ain’t going nowhere.

Of course, he may actually enjoy the sight of a flock of Lesser Spotted Pasig Shrimp Dippers dissolving in front of his eyes. Who knows?

Anyway, back to Du30 and already he’s demonstrating how he’ll pull the country together. For the first time since independence the President and Vice-president will be inaugurated, not only in separate ceremonies, but in totally different cities! In addition, he has offered his new VP no official post within his government and to date, hasn’t even met with her. How’s that for extending the hand of friendship? We can only assume it’s because her aim’s not so good, but it looks like she’ll have plenty of free time to practice.

He has invited ol’ Bong Bong Marcos, the defeated VP candidate, along to his bash though and, as we’ve said before, they’ll have lots to talk about. Dictatorship 101 anybody?

Bong Bong, in his turn, yesterday sought relief from the Presidential Electoral Tribunal to challenge VP-elect Leni Robredo's victory. In his electoral protest, Marcos asked the PET, which is made up of the Supreme Court's magistrates, to set aside Robredo's proclamation on May 27 and instead declare him the winning vice presidential bet in the May 9 elections. And why not.

You’ll see now why things take so long to happen here when I tell you that Marcos’ petition is some 21,000, yes, twenty one thousand, pages long. Can’t see anyone getting through that lot before quarter to twelve today!

So there you have it, the stage is set for six years of fun and games. Of course, all the Duterte nay-sayers may be proved completely wrong, or alternatively, wind up completely dead.

Hopefully we can now get this thread back on track and turn to railway stuff but of course, we will endeavour to keep you updated with all the latest facts and gossip, providing your correspondent doesn’t end up as fish food of course.