Letter from Manila - Santol - of course!

Did not see that coming! Done and dusted in 45minutes and they paid you for being there! Maybe Dirty Harry as president has given every one a wake up call....... has made interesting reading in the papers now that I can somewhat context it all.

Ah yes, the President. He's sworn in on June 30th, so anyone for a first of July hanging?

It's funny, I went through the fun of the teenage bit years ago with my lad, who's now all grown up and living in Phnom Penh, so sort of put it all behind me. Then when I first met Madam, Tania was three, I didn't really know the other and, as we lived in different countries, I never really thought about it too much. Now I have two of 'em on a day-to-day basis, it concentrates the mind somewhat!

Got to admit though, teenagers here are very different to their peers in the UK. I know it's a bit of a sweeping generalisation, but they don't seem to have the rebellious streak I remember so well!


And any bonuses in the Philippines are totally unexpected!


PHP10,000 is around GBP150, so maybe a couple of bottles at least. Shame I don't drink the stuff, but I have found somewhere stocking Calvados, to which I'm just a little bit partial I blame all those years of Le Mans!

Gotta be careful on your other point. Y'see Tania is Madam's daughter and Jey-Ann is her brother's and we've basically looked after her since she was about eight. Her parents split up and her father couldn't give a rat's bum, his only visible means of support being his legs (except when he's stolen enough to be on the Red Horse, when they give up as well) and her mother immediately started a new family of her own kicking Jey-Ann, literally, onto the streets. When she came to us, she was a pathetic, half starved little waif and covered in lice, although you wouldn't think it seeing the lovely and happy young lady now. Her parents still live in Tondo, so she sees them on the streets regularly, and I know it still hurts her to remember how she was treated. Well it would, wouldn't it?

So, much as we can joke on here, I'm always very concious of making sure she knows that both her and Tania are loved by me for the people they are, not where they come from. No distinctions.

Anyway, being a natural pi55 taker, I'll always poke fun at her, but never about her worth, if you see what I mean.  

That was a bit serious, sorry, and actually quite hard to write, bringing back some pretty nasty memories. It also reminds me we have some unfinished business in Tondo. 


I had mentally written off Tuesday, so no-one was more surprised than me! 

Back onto Duterte, it's going to be interesting living here for a while. Let's see if what he's done in Davao can be translated into governing a country of people who basically don't want to be governed!


Unfortunately, they were sitting next to me at the time. Still, I told them their food bill at Adriatico was just...yup, ten thousand. Not too sure they believed me though.

Aye, nothing like liquidating your assets

Wow, what a swerve. I’m proud of me.

Madam was dead set on taking her little Shih Tzu with her today to the world renowned Enchanted Kingdom, until I pointed out that along with guns, playing cards and flutes, dogs were a no-no.

“But what will I do with him” she wailed.

Quick as a flash, I said, "Why don’t I look after both of the dogs in the apartment and you have a great day out with the kids without having to worry". A kind and selfless offer on my part, you'll agree. 

Anyway, whichever deity you choose, I thank him/her/it that I made it.

So, the original “Filipina Plan” was for them to set off from Tondo at 12 noon as the park opens at two. Good stuff, plenty of time and originally they were to pick me up here at around 12.30, arriving at our destination at just around opening time. We’d all have a lovely day and then, exhausted but happy, come home.

The reality goes like this.

Phone call at 10am saying they were “just preparing” and would be at the apartment at around 12.30 to drop the pup off. Plan still on course.

Another call at 12.20 saying they were still “just preparing” and may be a "little" bit late. “Just preparing” can also be a synonym for “Girls just woken up.” Plan wobbling a tad?

I call at 2.30 to see what’s happening. The youngest bottle opener answers and tells me they are “just preparing” What plan?

At 3.38 I get an SMS to say they are, “on the way.” By way of explanation, “on the way” can mean anything from sitting in the car with the engine running to just drying their hair. The shower to wash it counts as, “just preparing”

4.08, another SMS saying, “we near now”. Again, for clarification, “we near now” can mean anything from sitting in the car with the engine running to just drying their hair. As an aside, the first time we landed a Clark Field and drove back to Manila, I spent over six hours being told by Madam, “we near now”.

4.28, they actually are here and I relieve the party of pup, look suitably noble about my sacrifice and say, “Ta ta”.

At 6.29 I send SMS to see it they’ve arrived safely.

The response, at 7.08 tells me "We here now."

The park shuts at 9.

So, whilst they try to cram in 25+ rides in less than two hours, I’m kicking back, typing this with a cold beer accompanied by two well fed dogs asleep at my feet. Homemade soup up next as well.

However, if things had gone to their “plan”, I’d have been with them.

I think I like mine better!

sometimes plan B is the better one!

Know what you mean, I think a cattle prod and a sheepdog are in order.

Funny thing is that Madam is generally a stickler for being on time if she has to be somewhere, but this all seems to go out the window on any family outings.

I wasn't there but I'm guessing the morning went something like this:

Madam arises, has some breakfast. An hour or so later, one of the Girls stirs. She is hungry, Madam cooks her breakfast then goes for a little lie down. At some point the second Bottle Opener awakes. Unsurprisingly, she is hungry. Cooks some breakfast. Madam reawakens.

In the meantime, neither of the Girls will have made any attempt to shower. Madam showers. Eventually the Girls, dragging themselves from Facebook, head for ablutions. This is not a quick process.

The first of the friends also attending this expedition arrive. They will be hungry. Madam, by now also hungry again, sets about cooking a "little lunch" for ten, before departure. As the last of the passengers arrives, probably around 2pm, they sit down to eat, finally hitting the road and hour and an half later.

As I say, I wasn't there but if I close my eyes, I can picture it perfectly.


It most definably was in this case!


God, don't encourage them. Mind you, they could still be late even if they only had to walk across the car park. My lot getting organised is like a little microcosm of the entire country.

Anyway, got a call lst night at around nine forty-five to say that they were "on the way" back to Tondo. Who knows, they may even have arrived by now. 

I would imagine it's been the case at more than one theme park where someone has wanted their remains sprinkled around their favourite 'Magical place to visit'.

I imagine taking the loved one to the water park would probably... cement the memory of them forever in time...

George, I think you need to read your own thread about 15 posts up...you're living in a country where a recently departed candidate can still be on the ballot for president...and get votes!! After that, taking dearly departed Uncle José on a roller coaster seems quite sane by comparison.